Sunday, August 8, 2010

What's the Word?

I'm on the train now, NYC, Penn station, headed to Harrisburg, PA. I last got a text from Shawn this morning saying they were almost packed up to go. I'm hoping my arrival in Pennsylvania coincides with theirs, if we can find each other, we'll be together by about 1pm.
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I had a great weekend at BlogHer '10, and I told many people about this trip. I got a little nervous this morning, in the wee hours, and found myself unable to sleep. Did I remember everything? Will it be too hot for us to be comfortable? What happens if one of us gets sick, or too tired? Will I need to drive the giant RV, or will Shawn do most of the driving? Did we really decide to just "wing it", and drive without reservations to park the rig each night? Will making dinner be a struggle every night?

I realized that we will ultimately be just fine, we deal with little disasters all the time. Having a non-verbal child and a toddler means that most of our life in unpredictable in some way. I think the best thing I can do is to be a relaxed and happy mom and wife on this trip. In close quarters, or away from home, or even in my own living room, the attitude I take on influences the dynamic in our house. Just as Jack's migraines, or too little sleep for Katie can disrupt our family's sense of well-being, my anxiety or irritability rubs off on my kids, and can't help but make my husband bristle.

So, I am trying to come up with a phrase, or a keyword to remember when I feel myself going off-kilter. When Katie is upset we say "gummy bear" a phrase she gave us to remind her to be calm and settle down. Maybe this time we'll create a family word to cue us; something we can say to each other when it appears anyone has forgotten how much fun we're having, and how cool it is that we are on this great adventure.

Maybe it should be "lucky."

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